Everything's going to change, isn't it?
We had a perfect friendship, the three of us. We were so different, no one understood how we could even be friends. I loved the funny faces they made when I told them who I was spending my Friday night with. But it worked, our little thing we had going on. The really smart guy, involved in all the non-sports-related extra-curriculars, the emo guy, new to town, and me, the girl whose interests crossed somewhere between yours plus sports. I loved what we had. We joked. We made fools out of ourselves and didn't care that people were watching. We could talk for hours and forget about all the homework that we were actually supposed to be working on. It was different from any other friendships I had. It was an escape.
But then something changed. I've thought alot about whether girls and guys can ever really be just friends. I hoped, I really did, that they could. For a while there I thought I had found the answer I was looking for. And then, well, I don't really know what happened. Suddenly, instead of the three of us, it became two. Me and one guy, or me and the other. I didn't think much of it, partly because I didn't want to, and partly because I had convinced myself that it was just because our schedules were too different, making plans for three just wasn't possible. Of course, when you asked me out, it became a little difficult to ignore this little love triangle I unknowingly built for myself.
Or did I know? Didn't I ask someone a couple weeks ago if I should be worried about you wanting more than friendship? Didn't I lie awake several nights running over in my head the things you had said? Haven't I known for a while now that, no, girls and guys can't be just friends? And yet, I kept going. I didn't try to make my intentions clearer. I never stopped to think about how this could hurt you. Instead I just ignored your feelings, because I didn't want to deal with them. I was happy with where we were and I didn't want it to change so I just pretended to not notice. I lead you on. I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you. And now I don't know how to tell you all this.
Yes, everything is going to change.
But then something changed. I've thought alot about whether girls and guys can ever really be just friends. I hoped, I really did, that they could. For a while there I thought I had found the answer I was looking for. And then, well, I don't really know what happened. Suddenly, instead of the three of us, it became two. Me and one guy, or me and the other. I didn't think much of it, partly because I didn't want to, and partly because I had convinced myself that it was just because our schedules were too different, making plans for three just wasn't possible. Of course, when you asked me out, it became a little difficult to ignore this little love triangle I unknowingly built for myself.
Or did I know? Didn't I ask someone a couple weeks ago if I should be worried about you wanting more than friendship? Didn't I lie awake several nights running over in my head the things you had said? Haven't I known for a while now that, no, girls and guys can't be just friends? And yet, I kept going. I didn't try to make my intentions clearer. I never stopped to think about how this could hurt you. Instead I just ignored your feelings, because I didn't want to deal with them. I was happy with where we were and I didn't want it to change so I just pretended to not notice. I lead you on. I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you. And now I don't know how to tell you all this.
Yes, everything is going to change.
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